“We’re Still in the Submarine below Stockholm,” Says Karamazov

“We’re still down here, tapping the secrets flowing through the sub sea fiber of Swedish intelligence. Submarines are very practical, but they can get a little bit claustrophobic,” says Ivan Fyodorovich Karamazov.

“At least in this one, a Dolgorukiy class sub. It’s powered by uranium-235, and it can throttle on for decades before any refueling.”

Preevyet, Cheeky Coder!

At one point there were a lot of stuff happening above us, lots of sonar traffic. The Swedish navy and newspapers, looking for us.

We even received Morse code from the Red Cross, asking “are you down there?”

We morsed in reply:

.– . / …. .- …- . / -… — ..- –. …. - / .-.. — - - . .-. -.– / - .. -.-. -.- . - … .-.-.-

Of course, only people who know Morse code will get that joke.

So what are we doing down here? I was asked by the FSS about how to hack into the computer lines of the security police in Sweden, or Säpo as they call it. Or The Monkey House as we call it.

They might be a bunch of jumping monkeys, but they have been foreseen enough not to connect their computers to the Internet. But the fiber cables – dug into the mud under the Stockholm harbour – travel straight into the building at Polhemsgatan.

And the rest is easy. This real stuff makes all that spy-stuff going on in that Forsythe guy’s books just plain boring.

I asked Syromolotov if this wasn’t a breach of Swedish borders. “We cannot see the borders under water,” he laughed.

Got to go. It’s lunchtime in the mess. If one messes with the mess, viper will eat viper, and it will serve them both right!

Best luck,


This is a post in the Ivan The Hacker series. Posts in this series:

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