Letter from Linus

“I have no clue who this Dheeman is and I have certainly never merged a paper patch from him,” says Linus in a letter.

Yesterday Dheeman Chatterjee wrote that he had written his own operating system and submitted paper patches to Linus Torvald’s Linux.

Terve, Cheeky Coder.

I will tell you a story – listen carefully to what I have to say, I will not repeat it.

This will make it crystal clear:

I’m sitting in my home office wearing a bathrobe. In Finland we’re big on saunas. We’re big on saunas. Off with the bathrobes, water splashing coal, like in that song “Off with the bathrobes, water splashing coal! In soggy slippers and bathrobe he’s crowned!”

The coal is glowing and we sweat, but we are from Finland, we take it as a Finn should, we’re big on saunas.

Shots of vodka are served by the Old Man to celebrate the flames of wild Finnish oak. The Elder laughs. I like it. If you like a man’s laugh before you know anything of him, you may say with confidence that he is a good man. I’d been a lonely wanderer for six months. I’d learned something. Like Blanche in that old movie, a wanderer depends on the kindness of strangers. Not for anything specific or material. For morale.

The vodka is strong and as such it tastes good. It is the twilight zone of technology meets wood. And it explains why Linux never accepted any paper patches.

It could never happen, and never has. And never will. And never has. I have no clue who this Dheeman is an I have certainly never merged a paper patch from him.

Linus